Borrow money from pessimists--they don't expect it back
When on the ladder of success, don't let boys look up your dress!
Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk?
Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humor.
I don't pray because I don't want to bore God. - Orson Welles
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
The trouble with being poor is that it takes up all of your time. - Willem de Kooning
Never judge a book by its movie. - JW Eagan
It's no accident that stressed spelled backwards is desserts.
Procrastination is the greatest laborsaving invention of all time
Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear.
You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter
Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After marriage, the 'Y' becomes silent
God made man and then rested. God made women and then no one rested
Aim for the stars. But first, aim for their bodyguards.
The shortest distance between two points is under construction... - Noelie Altito
I ain't sleeping. I'm just taking a good look at the insides of my eyelids. - Johathan Raban
The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think. - Horace Walpole
A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand. - unknown
A diplomat is one who thinks twice before saying nothing.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but an onion a day keeps everyone away. - Cassandra Chatfield
Hard work never hurt anyone, but why take the chance.
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